Happy Halloween 2016!

At the Schwellenbach-Rigley household, all holidays are supercalifragilisticexpialidocious but Halloween is a special meld of several of my favorite things including make believe, candy, and autumn.

This year, we decided to attempt a group costume around the theme of one of my favorite movies, Mary Poppins. Colin bravely accepted the starring role; I have always yearned to be a dancing chimney sweep and finally fulfilled my ambition; Cat Cat was an admirable Admirable Boom; Cat Cat was an appropriately whiny Jane Banks; and our newest addition to the family, the xoloitzcuintli tripawd Leander played the dancing penguin, which is also one of my favorite roles.

This was our first group photo with three furkids instead of two and the chaos was worthy of a holiday dedicated to mayhem and cavities. Typically, we divvy up the cats, leaving Colin with one hand free to push the button on the camera. We hoped we would be able to convince one of the animals to sit still so we would still have some mobility but Leander gets nervous about photo shoots, Jack gets mad if he has to share my lap, and Cat Cat was not a fan of her bonnet. So … I tried to wrangle two writhing, shrieking cats while Colin ran to press the button, picked up Leander, and tried to pose as Mary Poppins. After several efforts, I was laughing so hard I was crying, we definitely were not going to achieve the polished, posed photo we were going for, so we figured we’d work with what we have.

Is it perfect?

No.

Is is an accurate reflection of life in a household with two cats, one dog, and two pseudo-adults?

Absofreakinglutely.

 

A Very Dungeons & Dragons Tea Party

 

How would you handle a surprise ambush by goblins?

If you’re playing Dungeons & Dragons, I suppose surprise ambushes are to be expected, and yes, I do understand that this defeats the “surprise” element. But that doesn’t mean our party of mostly first-time players was prepared on Sunday when the first ambush came.

Marialis, the stoner wizard (as played by my high school friend Michael Wangbelt) tried to eat the goblins, with limited to no success. Aquila Stratis, the dwarf cleric (and Michael’s girlfriend and nature geek, Carmen) took the practical approach of trying to cast spells. Pootytin Tumblebuns, the halfling (my boyfriend, Colin) mostly tried to flee or hide, while utilizing a Cockney accent roughly half the time. Despite never having played before, I was the Dungeon Master, mostly owing to my god complex and love of storytelling. And to round out the character list, we had Cat Cat playing as a human nobleman named Gato the Great and Jack playing as a folk hero human named Jack Strongpaw. Cat Cat mostly sucker punched goblins and Jack advocated the path of good over self-interest, which is the opposite of what he does in his own life. I should also add that we were dressed for high tea because this was a Dungeons & Dragons tea party.

It all started because I was depressed that we wouldn’t throw our annual Adult Easter Egg Hunt—a tradition that ran for several years thanks to my enormous backyard and involved a dozen or so mostly inebriated adults wandering my backyard looking for eggs stuffed with booze and other adult contents. We’re still relatively new to the Seattle area and our backyard is nowhere near large enough for the hundreds of eggs I typically hide. So I figured we’d do the next best thing: We’d throw a Dungeons & Dragons tea party, despite never having played Dungeons & Dragons and despite still not knowing very many people. Michael and Carmen made the drive from San Francisco and that was enough for me.

My visions of elbow-length gloves and ice cubes filled with edible flowers never quite came to pass, but I did manage to make flavored sugar cubes (orange and rum) utilizing a recipe I found online that just required food coloring, sugar, wax paper, and any flavor of extract. And Michael and Carmen went all out, wearing handmade top hats adorned with birds and bringing several tubs of tea and treats. Fortunately, I also have not one, but two gorgeous tea sets that friend, collaborator, and artistic genius Mignon Khargie gave me when she learned I was looking for a fancy tea set after I purchased my house. I’m not certain that she ever envisioned it being utilized for a Dungeons & Dragons tea party, but she knows me pretty well so she likely didn’t rule the possibility out either.

It took us awhile to get going. Michael was the only one who had ever played and I was juggling both the rule book and the adventure book detailing our group’s specific efforts, making progress slow. It also doesn’t help that Dungeons & Dragons is highly technical (compared to my usual CandyLand), and figuring out what to roll, and what proficiency or bonus to add or deduct was, well, let’s just say I don’t think we were actually playing correctly despite our best efforts. That said, the group did manage to evade or dispatch goblins on several occasions, spent a solid hour ridiculously battling wolves, and Marialis attempted to eat every single creature the group encountered, including the hostage goblin and some horses that were supposed to be dead but as the DM I couldn’t justify killing innocent animals so they miraculously survived.

We had five tea pots going at any given time, each with its own type of tea curated by Carmen and Michael; cucumber and cream cheese sandwiches cut into Easter shapes; cream cheese and jam sandwiches, peanut butter chocolate cake; crumpets; miniature cupcakes; cookies; and strawberry muffin tops. In short, I strongly suspect we all need to be tested for diabetes. We played and ate and slurped tea for about seven hours before we wore ourselves out. And honestly, I probably could have continued. It was fun and utterly ridiculous and the tea tasted damn good, especially with the purple rum sugar cubes.

Still smiling after seven hours of gameplay.

 

It was difficult seeing Carmen and Michael return to California; they brought a taste of home, the companionship and antics that we haven’t quite established in Seattle just yet. Most importantly, I think we began a new Easter tradition, one that will likely evolve just as our adult Easter egg hunts grew and give Michael an opportunity to practice his stoner wizard accent. Next year I pledge to take on ice cubes with edible flowers and find, steal, make, or buy some legitimate petits fours. It’s going to be epic.

A kickass feminist art-loving atheist’s Nativity

PHOTOS BY COLIN RIGLEY. Etsy artist at Scrambled Pegs successfully created (l-r) Cat Cat, Dinosaur 1, Jack, Albert Einstein, Dinosaur 2, Captain Malcolm Reynolds, Bill Nye, Sally Ride, Dumbledore, Neil deGrasse Tyson, Mary Shelley, Marie Curie, Bill Murray, Albus Dumbledore, Hermione Grander, and Ruth Bader Ginsburg for my reinterpreted Nativity. 

Call me an optimist–or don’t, whatever–but I genuinely believe that, despite being an atheist, there’s still a place for me at the Christmas table. Ideally the place closest to the fireplace and mashed potatoes, but I’ll take what I can get.

For a long while, my enthusiasm for Christmas was somewhat muted by the fact that I lived in an apartment which lacked space to store Christmas decorations and lights, and, though I did decorate, I always felt there was something lacking knowing it wasn’t my space. Making this year special for so many reasons I don’t have space to list. I have a house now. My first Christmas in my own house.

But suddenly the space, the sheer number of options and possibilities available to me, created questions, uncertainties. I wanted it all–the tree (as usual), the wreath, the lights, the orgy of poinsettias (faux, so as to avoid poisoning the cats) and tinsel and yes, the Nativity.

For the most part, it was actually pretty easy to find Christmas decor that suited my aesthetic requirements, which are fairly old-fashioned when it comes to the holidays. But the Nativity is such an unabashedly religious symbol that I didn’t feel quite comfortable utilizing a traditional Nativity scene on my fireplace mantle (a recent acquisition as my boyfriend and brother bought me a beautiful electric fireplace for Christmas).

I decided that the best way to handle the Nativity was to do my own interpretation of the scene, roughly following the traditional story but utilizing my own heroes in lieu of the more typical Nativity squad. I put a great deal of thought–too much, probably–into choosing these characters. I seriously considered a feminist Nativity utilizing only female characters. (Part of me still wishes I had gone that route.) My second choice was a science-themed Nativity, followed closely by a literary-themed Nativity. But in the end I couldn’t choose. I’m a feminist and bibliophile and while science doesn’t factor as largely into my identity, I sort of loved the statement a science-themed Nativity would make.

Mostly, I couldn’t leave anyone out. My tastes and hobbies are eclectic, and for a Nativity to truly represent me and my own particular brand of Christmas fanaticism, it would have to be odd as well.

I knew, of course, that it all had to start with Bill Murray in a manger. I also knew, of course, that my wise people would be women and that I wanted my cats to somehow be present. It just got weirder from there, but this was the cast that I wound up with:

Baby Jesus: Bill Murray from Life Aquatic.

Mary: Mary Shelley. The author of Frankenstein gets motherhood; what else is there to say?

Joseph: Charles Darwin. Being the father of evolutionary theory more than qualified him to be the esteemed stepfather.

Wise Women: Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg (that’s right, Notorious RBG in the house); Marie Curie (minus the radiation), and Hermione Granger.

Shepherds: Bill Nye, Albert Einstein, and Neil deGrasse Tyson.

Angels: Captain Malcolm Reynolds from Firefly, Sally Ride (from NASA), and Dumbledore. Admittedly, Dumbledore wasn’t entirely in keeping with the space theme I was going for but I could see Dumbledore’s ghost floating around in space so I decided to just go with it.

Menagerie: Rather than cows and sheep and the assorted stable livestock, I decided to go with two cats–specifically my two cats, Jack and Cat Cat–and two dinosaurs. Why? Because it’s my Nativity. That’s why.

Then came the question of where I would acquire the figurines. The answer to this, and any question involving where to acquire something eclectic and unique, was Etsy. I did some quick research and found Scrambled Pegs, an Etsy shopped based out of Raleigh, North Carolina with remarkable peg dolls that resemble Audrey Hepburn from Breakfast at Tiffany’s, Frida Kahlo, the characters from Bob’s Burgers, and I immediately fell in love. The seller even had a Ruth Bader Ginsburg peg doll already listed for sale! A match made in heaven.

I messaged the artist about a custom order in mid-December, we discussed the details, and by early January I was excitedly ripping open a package containing my 16 Nativity figurines. Which truly are spectacular.

There are still quite a few details to work, namely the framework for the background. Do I go with a traditional manger? If so, do I make it myself? I discovered stunning wood carved backgrounds by Demetz Patrick, but the question of whether I should make something myself is not something I’ve been able to resolve. Then I saw some beautiful dioramas on Instagram and started considering doing something a little artsier than the typical rustic stable scene. Then there’s the question of how to frame the stable or backdrop–lights tucked behind fabric? Do I want stars or a moon hanging over the scene? Should I try to incorporate music into my display? And, of course, I still need the manger for Bill Murray …

Fortunately, I have 351 days and approximately 9 hours to figure it all out. Of course, I’ve got other stuff to do as well–publish Vestal, submit Book Three to publishers, work, freelance, write Book Four, and countless other house projects. But I can’t imagine any of these projects bringing me the same amount of pleasure as my very own Nativity in my very own home.

Merry Christmas from Seattle

 

Under normal circumstances, we take our cheesy holiday photo during our international travel adventures. It started in Peru, with this ridiculous photo at Machu Pichu in 2013 and then we just had to do the same thing in Turkey in 2014. I can’t even regret that we didn’t take off on a major international adventure this year because the adventure we did take on was still pretty amazing. We moved 1,000 miles, bought a house, dressed up our cats in Christmas sweaters and lived to tell the tale …

So whatever and however you celebrate, we hope your holiday season is as fabulous as our angry kitties.

And we look forward to next year’s card which will be photographed in the country that will complete my holy trifecta of countries I’ve wanted to visit since I was very young.

Stay tuned …

Lola’s Musical Christmas Countdown Part 2

Christmas is, somehow, less than two weeks away. Which means it’s definitely time to get into the spirit with some non-Top 40 holiday music. For that, we turn to Lola’s Christmas countdown, perfect to listen to while you wrap presents, bake cookies, and shoo your cats away from the Christmas tree.

(08) SADDERDAY. It’s Sadderday again, dearest friends, in Lola’s Christmas Countdown Spectacular, and on this particular day we share what may just be my favorite Christmas track. I remember how frustrated I was by the family hubbub around me the day this track came into my life—I love my family dearly but sometimes I just really need to recharge, and the sheer amount of energy around me combined with various member’s idiosyncrasies can make a day too much handle. In “Just For Now,” Imogen Heap describes family dynamics so many of us, though we may not admit it, have dealt with during the holidays—how the littlest comment can make or break an entire evening. Also, she’s singing with herself. Live.

(09) SUNGDAY. No longer legal for performance or print (as Whitacre never got the Frost Estate’s permission), Eric Whitacre’s choral masterpiece setting of Robert Frost’s Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening has long since gone as Sleep with new text by Whitacre’s poet friend, Charles Anthony Silvestri. If you’ve really never heard this gorgeous piece of music before, you’re in for a real treat…don’t miss out. Listen in the quietest space you can.

(10) SCORESDAY. It is generally agreed upon that The Nightmare Before Christmas is a holiday classic, but which holiday it is a classic for remains a point of contention. Some say all that fall within the Autumnal and Winter months. Some say just Hallowe’en or just Christmas. Some say “November!” which isn’t really a holiday, but is as good a guess as any—any save Disneyland’s, of course, which is “ALL YEAR ROUND HEY YOU KNOW WHAT FANTASYLAND TOMMOROWLAND AND MAIN STREET ALL NEED THAT’S RIGHT IT’S MORE SKELLINGTON COMING SOON TO A CRITTER COUNTRY NEAR YOU”. Whatever the answer is, I can tell you that my favorite musical moment in the entirety of the film happens for the first bit of this particular piece of the score. Enjoy!

(11) GROOVESDAY. Week three already! (I told you this plan was working.) Now, I’m embarrassed to say that today’s jazz feast features the same source material as last week, but at least it is a VERY different interpretation. I adore this arrangement and listen to a recording of Cuesta Voce lay it down every year. That recording isn’t online and unlike a few others in the countdown, I feel I have no authority to put it there myself, so here’s a random jazz group I have no real affiliation with performing the piece, instead!

(12) NERDSDAY. Minecraft is a bit like the big bang. What started as something incredibly small exploded and has left its reach all over the known universe. It’s a story of an indie game finding such success that it is no longer an indie game. Here’s a song about one player’s Christmas experience.

(13) SADDERDAY. Is it fitting that the 13th day of Christmas is a Sadderday? I certainly think so. Let’s be real here for a moment. At this time of year, some of your friends and family members are going to be even more depressed than normal. Just do what you can to be kind to them and love them no matter how down they feel, okay? Sometimes when someone tells you to be happy it’s that much harder to actually feel it.

(14) SUNGDAY. This is by far one of my favorite Christmas pieces. If Just For Now is tied for first (and last I checked, it was, though what with hasn’t been shared yet), this may possibly be second. Ambient Christmas music is not a particularly common experience, and making it out of such a classic carol to savor every single note of the the piece was a gorgeous decision. Take the time to breathe today, you deserve it. And maybe, when you take that time, you’ll recruit the Dale Warland Singers to help.

(15) SCORESDAY. Okay. There’s a lot to say about this one, so let’s buckle down. To begin with, this is from one of my favorite Christmas Specials ever, Doctor Who’s take on A Christmas Carol. Now, I adore A Christmas Carol. I love creepiness at Christmas and Dickens’ writing is nothing short of breathtaking. But the story is so good and has been told in so many different ways that I finally had reached a point in my life where I no longer got terribly excited for it or new takes on it. There seemed to me to be no creative ways to tell the story anymore. And then Steven Moffat, who as you may know has committed such a mixture of literary triumphs and atrocities that he’s rightfully earned a bad reputation, actually spun the story in a way I hadn’t considered—the story was always a bit like time travel, what if the time travel was actually there? It’s a funny, modern take which doesn’t shy away from any of the heavy stuff at all. I love everything about it and plan to watch it every year. To top it off, though, Murray Gold, the saint who already wows with his scoring for the show normally, seriously hit it out of the park with this piece of music. It is gorgeous and introspective and catches the tone perfectly.
That’s where the lyrics come in. This video is good for a few reasons–one, it doesn’t spoil anything about the episode itself if you haven’t seen it yet, but two, it focuses on the lyrics, which when I first took the time to really think about them, broke me down into a complete mess of sobbing. It’s hard for me to admit, but I know from a very private place within myself that this song is about fighting depression and isolation. It is the ultimate Christmas song in that it breaks through the frost of one person’s severe and chronic fear and pain with the love that only another can provide. It is often too hard for me to handle as a result. I hope that you can grow to love this song in the same way as I do, or at least appreciate it. “Let in the Light Of Your Sweet Shadow,” indeed. Merry Christmas.

 

Lola’s Christmas music countdown spectacular

Lola decided to continue the tradition after her musical Halloween countdown received rave reviews. So, courtesy of Lola’s Facebook page, and with her permission, this is the first week of her musical Christmas countdown. Merry listening!

Welcome back to my lair for yet another Countdown! This one was much harder to do. Unlike Hallowe’en, whose boundaries are much less defined, Christmas music is a specific “genre,” a genre loosely defined by “relating to winter and/or Christmas” and much of it extremely overplayed. I was able to say “this sounds spooky” and thus fits in the Hallowe’en category and thus had a treasure trove of material with which to work, Christmas isn’t even remotely as easy in that regard. After all, the list of things that can be considered scary or kitschy in a way Hallowe’en can appreciate probably goes on for ages, but Winter is only one season. However, it was a lot of fun finding the obscure gems I fill my wintertime with and being able to shine a spotlight on them for once. Weirdly, unlike the Hallowe’en one, I only had this done the night before, and even then, the last day or so are a little undefined. But I had to do it, as a sort of Christmas present/Thank You to those who followed my previous Countdown so intently, it really meant a lot to me, and I was happy, as always, to make a positive difference in someone’s life.

Having each day have a theme was never necessary to begin with, but it was fun and I think allowed excitement for what each would hold. In the end, I didn’t succeed on a full 7-day theme system again, but was clever enough to find a silly excuse for why the week was only 5 days long. For quite a bit, I had believed I could only get to twelve songs that weren’t too overplayed, but how many now? It’s at least 19. We’ll find out if I can pull any other tricks out of my sleeve. What’s particularly cool is that at least one of the days allows an approach to the Holidays that’s darker, and often a bit more honest. That’s a side we don’t see very often when we fatten ourselves with Thomas Kincade simplicity, but we know it’s there, lurking just out of sight, peering out slightly when our relatives say something that reminds us why we don’t actually talk with them terribly often.

The Holidays inspire a lot of music because of the heavy tradition that they hold. The traditions are really precious to people the world over, including, of course, myself; and thus are excellent material for poetic tangents—however banal they can be. However, there’s also an absolute corporate side to it. These are times of great spending, even, notably, over a long term, as not only can you cash in, but if you cash in a way that’s catchy enough there’s a chance that people will make them part of the traditions they revisit every single year–and then you’re basically set for life on THAT investment.

One of my favorite moments of the Holidays involves the music. It’s not one that everyone, particularly nowadays, gets to experience—but the singing of Christmas songs and carols in their wonderful, classy harmonies, the caroling in front of Santa’s House Downtown and in front of audiences with a choir, it’s truly magical and makes me feel like I’m making an effort to really capture the feeling I’m singing about. Chances are anything that qualifies as my “Favorite Christmas Song” are on this list. They’re not coming until a bit later, I think, but the choral song “Out of the Orient Crystal Skies” by Richard Zgodava, performed at a much slower tempo than is actually written in its real sheet music, gives me chills, and “Just For Now” by Imogen Heap, which takes a much more honest approach to the holidays than what you normally hear, arrived for me one Christmas on a day I really needed to hear it. I’ll be posting a live performance of it, but I recommend hearing the recorded one as well, as the differences are notable.

I hope everyone has a wonderful season, whatever it is they celebrate, and as before, I hope that this countdown will help make their holidays even the slightest bit more wonderful.

(01) GROOVESDAY. HAPPY DECEMBER, DEAREST LISTENERS! Your self-proclaimed hepcat is back with a new festive feast of musical munchies to coddle your Christmas cravings! It’s Lola’s Christmas Countdown SPECTACULAR! This Countdown has a brilliant plan I’m sure anyone who truly loves the holiday can appreciate—a method for tricking the universe into bringing Christmas sooner! How’s that, you ask? By following the same format as we did in October—a category for every day of the week—all FIVE of them. wink emoticon Get it? Today, as everyone knows, is of course GROOVESDAY. (I really think this is going to work!) Groovesday is the treasured day of the week devoted to your needs for Christmas Jazz! Well, we started off our journey into Hallowe’entown with the impeccable pipes of Kay Starr, so let’s do the same here with the song of hers that put her on my radar LAST Christmas–The Man with the Bag!

(02) NERDSDAY. As everyone knows, this day of the week, a week of course being comprised of only five days, is Nerdsday. It’s that special day when all of the geek that’s been building up over the rest of the week, ready to burst, finally does so in a glorious nebulous rainbow that smells good but has not been approved by the Food and Drug Administration for consumption. As this is my CHRISTMAS COUNTDOWN SPECTACULAR, I will of course ensure that any of my weekly Nerdsday discharge bears the distinctive flavor of our joyous holiday. Whereas later, other people’s fandom creations will be on display during this countdown, today, you have the privilege of sampling something that actually is mine, a piece I wrote back at the start of high school and still feel immensely proud of. Enjoy!

(03) SADDERDAY. Welcome back to my Countdown Spectacular, darlings! Isn’t Christmas just the most wonderful time of the year? HA! Sadly, not always. Let’s be frank, the holidays can be extremely stressful and depressing. In honor of this, but also because I am a being of little mercy or compassion for my fellow man, I have christened the third day of my clearly not fake week system SADDERDAY—the day of Christmas celebration set aside for releasing the pent-up frustration the holidays bring with them. Let us begin with this cheerful ditty by none other than the Nostalgia Critic himself. As should be expected from the title, the lyrics are very family-unfriendly and probably NSFW. Enjoy~

(04) SUNGDAY. Perhaps the most awkwardly-named day of the week, but one of the most beautiful—the COUNTDOWN SPECTACULAR day in celebration of Choral music~! Here is a piece that my own San Luis Obispo High School Concert Choir, yes, including me, performed that has rung true for me every year since. It’s a wonderful way to celebrate any season with all the meaty robustness one’s heart deserves. Many thanks to Paul Osborne for the recording.

(05) Scoresday. Hello! It’s Lola again! Would you like to know one of my favorite things in the whole world? Film Soundtracks! It should come as no surprise then that Scoresday is one of my favorite days of the entire week. In today’s installment of Lola’s Christmas Countdown Spectacular, we pay homage to Christmas through the perusal of an expanded detail. Remember in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (the movie) when for the briefest of seconds we hear a carol sung by a trio of ghosts? That’s just a tiny sliver of an entire song that was written by John Williams for the film. We get to hear three iterations of that piece today. We begin with the version that made it into the first official soundtrack, the entire carol with an eerie drone resembling the leitmotif used for the Invisibility Cloak, then hear the voices isolated on a later soundtrack, and finish with a much cheerier and no less official cover of the melody done with bells, which also made it into the film for just as brief a moment. Without further ado, Cast a Christmas Spell.

(06) Groovesday. Already at the beginning of December’s second week, we call back to the Duke himself for our Jazz quota. Did you know that Duke Ellington took a crack, in his own style, of course, at the entire Nutcracker suite? Pretty cool, eh? Here’s his sliiiick take on probably the most famous of the pieces from that Suite. Hope you’re enjoying my countdown!

(07) NERDSDAY. On the second day of the second week of the second countdown, we look to the fandom of one of the most indescribable of all creative projects: Homestuck. Getting into what Homestuck IS if you don’t already know is an exercise in futility, but it’s pretty wonderful for the most part, but despairingly lengthy. Anyway, this semi-animated, semi-interactive webcomic is known for its music; and its fandom, with the help of musicians responsible for some of the project’s official soundtrack, produced a Christmas album one year. Enjoy this very pretty and festive take on Skaia’s memorable leitmotif!

 

Merry Christmas from the girl who’s not perfect

PHOTO BY COLIN RIGLEY

In a couple of days I’ll be sending out my Christmas cards and it’s probably going to look, to the people who receive them, like I really have my life in order. Or, at least, under control. Because the holidays are the time for gratitude and cards with idyllic villages dusted with snow and families–according to the strictest definition of family–enjoying wholesome wintertime activities.

I’m also kicking off a month of blog posts–not quite one post for every day in the month of December as I have done in the past, but one every couple of days. And these conversations and photographs are going to create a particular impression of who I am. But nothing’s simple. It’s true that I am an overachiever who enjoys the holidays, but there are things I don’t share on Facebook or document on Instagram. Because social media is a double-edged sword; when you post about being happy and things going well you’re gloating or bragging but when you discuss the hardships or disappointments you’re ungrateful and whiny and lack perspective.

Of course my social media life is curated. Not necessarily to make myself look good–which I know is not the case when I discuss my 12-year-old-stoner eating habits and my cat’s habit of revenge pooping in the basement. The truth is, I’m better with some emotions (humor, outrage, more outrage) than I am with others (vulnerability, sorrow, uncertainty). But I don’t want my friends to receive my Christmas card and construct a false narrative for themselves.

Several months ago my doctor prescribed me anti-anxiety medication. Until that moment, I believed I had everything pretty well under control, mentally, at least. But my body was a mess and it turned out that mess was caused by my brain.

After a lot of testing and misdiagnosis, I was diagnosed with IBS which I have to admit I knew nothing about except that it was hilarious and that people like Ben Stiller made money off of pretending to have it in movies, which mostly meant really terrible gags about diarrhea. I didn’t know that IBS was linked to stress and anxiety, that a high percentage of people who experienced it had experienced some form of abuse, that IBS manifests in different ways in different people. In my case, that manifestation involved experiencing intense back pain when I was severely stressed, which would then lead to an all-night vomiting marathon. I’d vomit until there was nothing less to vomit and continue painfully dry-heaving into the night. What I experienced had no place in a romantic comedy. There were nights when I genuinely believed I was dying, nights when my boyfriend lay beside me in bed worrying and reminding me to tell him when I was ready to go to the hospital.

All because of IBS. Which really translated to: all because of anxiety.

I don’t consider myself an especially sensitive or delicate person. As I said earlier, I have a pretty classic A-type personality and like to have control over more situations than is probably realistic. I also don’t like to address emotional issues and have always believed that with determination and a good workout I could power through anything. Until my all-night vomiting marathons began, along with a host of other unpleasant symptoms such as feeling dizzy and lethargy. But despite how long it went on and how bad it got, I was not prepared for the answer to be that my brain was somehow broken; that’s a crude way to put it, I know, but that is very much how it felt, how it still feels, and I had never felt more defective.

I don’t know if I would have taken that pill the first time if I didn’t have a boyfriend who told me that it wasn’t a big deal, that my brain is not, in fact broken. That I couldn’t spend two to three nights per week vomiting anymore. I’m the type of person who resists taking an Advil when I have a migraine, in part because I don’t entirely trust that it will really work and in part because I really, genuinely fear that taking it is an indication of weakness. And if my body being weak wasn’t bad enough, the notion that my own brain had betrayed me was humiliating.

The pills helped. They still do. Since I started taking them I haven’t spent a single night sick. I also eliminated several foods–including my beloved coffee–that my doctor said might be contributing to the problem. I still see myself differently than I did before. I feel flawed in ways that I never did before and guilty because I couldn’t manage to pull this simple life together without a little help.

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”

I saw this quote on a friend’s Facebook page the other day and however trite it may be, it actually felt encouraging, reminding me that it’s not the worst thing to be overwhelmed by the world’s problems to the point that they become my own. The things that bother me–poverty, animal cruelty, war, inequality, the decimation of our environment–should bother me. And the fact that my body processes that stress and anxiety in that particular way is my own bad luck. But I don’t think it makes me a lesser person.

I do not mean to be a downer during my favorite time of the year–a time I still believe is dedicated to companionship, joy, giving, and warmth. But I don’t want to feel obligated to shove all life’s untidiness under a Christmas tree skirt and pretend it doesn’t exist, or to encourage anyone else to sweep their obstacles away because they’re worried they don’t belong in the family Christmas card. The reality–mine, at least–is that I’m going to enjoy my Christmas dinner and eggnog and cookies, but my day is still going to start with that little white pill. And that doesn’t negate the rest of it–my own weird family with my weird boyfriend and charming-and-terrible-in-equal-measure cats and my incredible excitement over my first Christmas in my first house. It just means that life is sometimes a little rough and pretty much everyone is going through something they likely can’t or won’t talk about.

Lola’s Musical Halloween Countdown: The Finale

Alright kids, it’s the third and final edition of Lola’s Musical Halloween Countdown, providing your spooky soundtrack for the month of October. Don’t be too sad, however! I’m trying to talk Madam Lola into a similar endeavor for the month of December!

October 21: A bit of internet difficulty has prevented me from posting today’s entry until now. But, here, again, is a Who Knows? Wednesday! In my younger years I had quite the obsession with Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events. Though the series could certainly get repetitive, the utterly unique atmosphere and combination of morose and harshly surreal and sarcastic narration were too fascinating, particularly when combined with a mystery that continued to unfold, never the entire way, but just enough to make you wonder if it ever would. Followers of my weekly column may be able to see how Snicket’s unique writing style was a definite influence in the development of my own. Well, did you know that number one villain of the series, Count Olaf, has an official villain song? It’s true! When it came time to bring the novels into the world of audiobooks, actual human Daniel Handler (known for being Snicket’s associate and representative, but in reality the man known as Snicket himself) talked to longtime friend Stephen Merritt, of band the Magnetic Fields, about getting each release to have a song written especially for it. All 14 songs (one was replaced with another in a later printing) plus an additional exclusive were eventually released in a standalone album titled The Tragic Treasury. Here is the song for the very first book, “The Bad Beginning”, featuring, as sometimes occurs in works by the Magnetic Fields, Lemony Snicket himself on the accordion.Yes, that’s actually him!

“People say, ‘Do these books have any messages for young people?’ And I say, ‘Of course, it’s one of the most important lessons in all literature. The lesson is: if you see Count Olaf, scream and run away. You don’t get that from CS Lewis’-Daniel Handler

October 22: When hinges creak in doorless chambers, and strange and frightening sounds echo through the halls…whenever candle lights flicker…where the air is deathly still! That is the time when GHOSTS ARE PRESENT! Practicing their TERROR with GHOULISH DELIGHT! WELCOME, FOOLISH MORTALS, TO YET ANOTHER DISNEY DONNERSTAG! I am your hostess…your ghost hostess…and if you didn’t already know this about me, my love for Disney’s the Haunted Mansion runs deeply enough to require psychoanalysis and the regular recommendation of a few more pills in the morning. But did you know that at Disneyland Paris, the Haunted Mansion’s story is different? Yes! Located in its own land, which combines the storylines for its version of Big Thunder Mountain Railroad and what it labels as ‘The Phantom Manor’, the delightfully creepy tour takes guests through the lush estate of a rich railroad baron whose daughter becomes engaged to a suitor he bares the utmost disapproval in. On their wedding day, the father murders them to prevent true love from ever conquering all. All the mourning spirit of the daughter can do is attempt to ferry you through safely lest her father take a bloodthirsty eye to your own lives…

Nope, I’m not making this up at all. It’s gorgeous, it’s creepy, it features narration by the one and only Vincent Price doing what he does best. Some day, I will go. For now, I can enjoy this gorgeous, officially-sanctioned suite of the attraction’s music. Those familiar enough with the Grim Grinning Ghosts motif of the original Haunted Mansion will be delighted to hear this unique spin on the work.

October 23: Egads! Another Fearful Friday! Perhaps it’s a sign of the apocalypse! This popular and classic tune, notably used in everything from The Walking Dead to An American Werewolf in London, speaks of the end times without succumbing to the cliche of one horse devouring another. If that wasn’t enough, it’s catchy! Happy Wednesday! WATCH YOUR BACK.

October 24: We’ve reached the penultimate Storytelling Saturday, and as I expect you’ll be so busy on Hallowe’en itself that you won’t give a thought to the countdown, I’ve saved the best for second-to-last. What you are about to experience is the most spooky, the most suspenseful, the most unabashedly intense, and, by far, the most important story you will hear this entire month. Listen, so that you might one day save yourself from a particularly gruesome fate…..Happy one week left, listeners.

October 25: Our final Soundscape Sunday. Danny Elfman is generally regarded as a master of the weird when it comes to his film scores. His general ties to Tim Burton expound this further, and for so many, it really just isn’t Hallowe’en without a trip into “The Nightmare Before Christmas.” But many are unaware that he was once asked to write music purely for music’s sake…no film attached! His journey into concert music, the wonderfully titled “Serenada Schizophrana,” begins with the following track. And, what luck! Youtuber kattemallo has every single piece in the work uploaded, just keep clicking when you’re done with the piece! Though not written for use with a film, it ended up being added to one anyway, IMAX’s Deep Blue Sea. One more fact—a later track, which has Spanish lyrics, is about a person having a thought and then completely losing it, and then searching everywhere for it. Elfman has said in many interviews that a lot of his writing process takes inspiration from the everyday sounds around him, such as a car passing by or air conditioning unit going off. This, however, means that he can lose ideas just as easily as he gains them, a true sense of frustration for him.

October 26: My greatest regret with this countdown is that I had the category of Mundane Monday, but thankfully, this is the final one. Seriously, though… What’s so scary about this cover? After all, it’s the same lyrics as always!

October 27: Our our last excursion into TV land unearths the following fanmade gem….a villain song for a horde of fruit bats from a My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic episode. Oddly, they aren’t even really villains–they’re a hungry pest that the mane characters decide to try and settle with mind control and violence. Good stuff! Eurobeat Brony, creator of this wonderfully fun piece, also concocted the original version of “Discord!”, which, as I stated here in a previous rant, is the victim of less press than its popular cover, as well as a great deal of unfair negative comparisons. If somehow you haven’t heard it already, I’ll post it below. It’s definitely a favorite.

October 28: Who Knows? Wednesday is at its end, but what a finale! Did you know that that that terrifying spider you saw this morning as you were putting on your bra has a theme song? You know the spider I’m talking about. The one that shows up right when you’ve gotten comfy with your hot chocolate and are cuddled up on the couch. The one that scuttles across your math textbook confusedly, minding its own business like the demon spawn it is. What’s that? You want to know why I didn’t just put THIS in Mundane Monday? C-C’mon, man…spiders are serious business….I’m not overreacting at all!

Fun Fact: This song is noted for being possibly the first appearance of the death metal growl in music—even though it’s not even death metal!

Pun Fact: Look at the band. Now look at the day of the week. Now groan.

*blows a kiss* It’s October 29, darlings. Our final foray into the Disney Vault. This is going to require a particularly forceful spell…

…FIGITUS…ATENCIO!

Ah! This is from an invigoratingly forbidden tome…Commonly translated as ‘The Emperor’s New Groove,’ a closer meaning to the old tongue would be….’The Kingdom of the Sun.’ Yes, Disney’s goofy South American buddy comedy was originally a much darker tale—certainly much more serious. The transition from its initial creative vision to what we got instead was not a happy process, particularly for the artist Sting, who had been hired to write the music. This is perhaps the most notable artifact salvaged from the wreckage…the villain song for Yzma, who was not, in fact, a mad scientist, but instead a dark sorceress. Wonderfully, Ertha Kitt herself did in fact record the piece before it was scrapped. I’ll let the plot here surprise you with its own words, and perhaps, if we all believe hard enough, some of that old magic will be rekindled—–and Hallowe’en will last forever. Best listen a few times extra just in case

October 30: It’s okay. There’s no need for words now. I understand. Let me do all the talking, okay? For a Fearful Friday Finale, here’s a little something you know, but a little different than you remember it. Happy All Hallow’s Eve’s Eve.

October 31: I’m rather sad to see this project go, but let us put away our sadness and embrace the manic joy and fear of the day! Here’s one more Story Saturday to sate your Hallowe’en lust, just in time for you to head to the festivities the evening will bring. And though this story is ending, another is beginning…..I am pleased, if also terrified, to announce that I will be participating in National Novel Writing Month again this year, and unlike the last time, when, despite my great proclamation of participation, I barely made it a few days in, I am contractually obligated to complete the challenge this year—it is essentially a senior project for my health class, my graduation depends upon my forcing myself to write every day as an outlet for my mental health. But let’s not worry about that for now! Let’s worry about bats, skeletons, houses (and bays) that you should never ever enter, alone or otherwise. Let’s worry about laughter and tears and memories we will never forget, even if we want to. Let’s make memories worth remembering. On the most morbidly-curious day of the year, allow us our memento mori. For if we remember how fragile this existence is, how easily we can lose our money, our jobs, our homes, our loved ones, our lives….if we remember all of this, perhaps, somewhere deep in the shroud that we have spent so much time suffocating in—perhaps somewhere in that darkness we can remember a sound. A smell. And we can grope our way towards somewhere slightly less damp. Maybe with windows just thin enough for light to poke through their marbled blue stained glass, casting upon the path in front of us images of truths we had forgotten. Perhaps, when we eventually die in the catacombs we’ve been exploring, it will be with a hand at our side. Or a plaque on our wall. Or even just a secretive, sly smile—a smile that need not have any meaning for anyone but ourselves, but holds as much meaning as anything a museum could possibly ever acquire. I hope you find what you’re looking for in that darkness. More than that, however, I hope whatever awaits in that darkness finds YOU. You have my blessing, listeners. Madame Lola Cloudburst, signing out one last time. Happy Hallowe’en!

Lola’s Musical Halloween Countdown: Part Two

Following up on my introduction to Lola’s Musical Halloween Countdown, here is the second installment of seasonally appropriately and carefully curated music from my buddy Lola. Get cozy beside a cackling fire with a nice mug of butterbeer (or the closest approximation you can get your hands on) and enjoy!

October 11: Our second Soundscape Sunday has arrived, and with it a piece by the constant target of the shaft at the Oscars–Thomas Newman! His gorgeous music has backed classics such as The Shawshank Redemption, Finding Nemo, American Beauty, and WALL*E. Yet another example of a nomination that went nowhere for the poor man was his work on the underrated film adaptation of Lemony Snicket’s a Series of Unfortunate Events. So be drawn now into a world of grotesque villains, mysterious acronyms, and an overall feeling of doom. I present for your listening displeasure: Verisimilitude!

October 12: Damn it all, the workweek has returned once again. Time for another Mundane Monday. For the life of me, I still cannot remember why this category exists … none of its entries have even the slightest thing to do with Hallowe’en! Take today’s example …. what’s so scary about meeting the neighbors? Nothing, I tell you!

October 13 … good number! We’ve arrived at another TV Tuesday, and, y’know, it just doesn’t feel right to host any sort of Hallowe’en celebration without a piece by this classic early Y2K rock band that sold the concept in everything they did. From Coolsville to Crystal Cove, the Hex Girls’ trademark Witch’s gathering shtick has attracted countless listeners to the truly talented trio. But why stop at just one piece when you can have all of them? Here’s the incredible concert that they’ve been giving continuously since 1999; for all we know, it hasn’t even ended yet! For those not in the know, The Hex Girls is a fictitious band hailing from the Scooby Doo Universe that keeps popping up in more and more projects. Their music really rocks, minus some moments of cheese or ear-grating interjections from members of the Mystery Inc crew. I would not actually ask you to listen to the full half an hour of this, which I have shared due to my deep amusement that someone actually went the trouble (though you certainly could and might not regret it at all). However, if you’ll listen to any of it, PLEASE check out their incredible “Trap of Love”, which I will post below. Hailing from “Mystery Incorporated”, a recent series with incredible animation, humor, character development, plot, and even scares (I’ve watched through it twice, I’ve outgrown scooby and yet Mystery Incorporated ranks in my top ten shows); “Trap of Love,” in addition to sounding really slick, is actually an early moment of crucial character development for, of all people, Daphne, who sings its lead vocals under the stage name “Crush” due to certain relationship issues. But don’t take my word for it, let the Hex Girls themselves put their spells on you!

October 14: Who Knows? Wednesday knows how to ask the truly important questions in life. For example, when the robots do inevitably overthrow the earth, what will be the catalyst? And will any of them feel bad about it? Of course, we all know they won’t. They have no emotion, right?

October 15: Disney Donnerstag! Not everyone knows this, but Donner means Thunder in German. Similarly, our Thursday comes from Thor, god of lighting. Allegedly, there will be actual lightning today. Nice, eh? Something else not everyone knows? Disney actually sanctioned an official cover of “Heigh-Ho!” by, of all people, Tom Waits, and it’s creepy as hell. Much has been said of its reminding people of slave work in mines, and playing to the idea of a soul run ragged by the 9 to 5. I’ll leave it to you to decide how much stock you give any of that. This is from an album titled ‘Stay Awake’ (as in, the song from Mary Poppins) and all of the tracks have some weird reinvention. Waits would later re-release this song on another album, but for reasons beyond anyone’s comprehension, layer an additional instrumental solo over most of the entire track that many fans agree takes away some of the power. Here is the original, with its absence of said layer. Amazing what one can….DIG…up, eh? Eh? EH???

October 16: By the pricking of my thumbs, Fearful Friday this way comes. Remember this little Macbeth-inspired ditty from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban? Not this version! Here it is arranged for concert by Williams himself, performed by the City of Prague Philharmonic Orchestra. There’s really not that much to say here, so let the glorious music speak for itself!

October 17: Good evening, friends and companions. By the hollowness of the wind as it drags its body reluctantly across the landscape, I judge that we have arrived yet again at a Storytelling Saturday. Today, to transport us into a world of story and song, we call once again upon a capella metal band Van Canto, who so graciously performed our first Fearful Friday. With the release of their fourth album, Break the Silence, came news of a new, exciting project combining their songwriting and performing talents with artists and a digital production company to produce what was to be a semi-interactive app detailing through animation and opera a new take on the story of Peer Gynt, with additional chapters released episodically. The album’s book of lyrics and musical credits folded out into one big poster, with a massive visual teaser for the work on the back side, and the final bonus track on the disc was the audio of the very first episode. News of the project bubbled slowly at first. The band encouraged its fans to vote for approval of a stage production of the work in a German theatre’s contest, and it actually ended up taking second place–which, according to the contest’s rules, meant that it still had earned a showing of some sort. An article on the theatre’s website featured tiny snippets of music from the story, even music beyond what was featured in episode one. And then came the fiasco of the theatre holding out on their promise, despite the contest results. News of the app, or even stage play, came slower and slower, until it finally lay dormant, with even the project’s website completely disappearing. Van Canto has never come out and officially said the project is dead, but all signs point to it being so. However, before it vanished completely, the band uploaded a youtube video of the first episode, perhaps as much of it as we’re ever going to get. The story is unfinished, and it is hard to follow. But damn, is it sexy! Here’s one of the more visually-unsettling works the countdown will feature. I hope you enjoy the auditory glory that only something this bizarre can produce!

October 18: Somewhere deep in a forgotten crevasse, which fondles a memory you didn’t think you’d ever be able to taste again … there’s a feeling there of discovery, of importance that you believed in so defiantly as a child but which seemed to fade away with age as the calling you felt towards an almost supernatural force never came. Maybe once in the greatest while you’ll be hiking and discover a secluded glen, or a song will play when you’re half asleep and the moon is too drunk to pay attention…and the feeling returns. Is the feeling like this? And if it is, do you even dare to follow? Time’s running out … better catch the moment befo–

October 19: *sigh* Another Mundane Monday … I feel so deeply unprofessional with this category. What on earth was I thinking with this song? It’s a tough economy, somebody’s gotta do the dirty jobs. Considering someone to be subhuman just because they work a blue collar job … I ought to be ashamed of myself.

October 20: Ladies, Gentlemen, and All Else Who I Have Not Covered Already, TV Tuesday is here yet again! She heard about our previous feature on the Hex Girls, and is here to take the stage back from, and these are her words, not mine, “those posers who have no idea how a REAL supernatural force brings the house down.” We are proud to present the starlet who died and went to show business, Ms.! Ember! McLain!

This pop idol of your tween years, hailing from NickToon series “Danny Phantom,” has never sounded better. Supposedly, her hit single was never released very honorably, being masked by editing and other sound in her premiere episode, and being stripped of effects that really helped it sparkle and shine the one time it was ever actually released as a standalone. Here, finally, is the track as it was always meant to be! You can read more about that in the description of the actual video, but for now, give it up for Ember McLain!

Look for the third and final installment of Lola’s Musical Halloween Countdown at the end of October!

Lola’s Musical Halloween Countdown

My buddy Lola is both a Halloween fiend and music fanatic (or maybe that’s Halloween fanatic and music fiend?). She’s combined her passions and created a musical Halloween advent calendar of sorts–one song per day, thoughtfully curated–which she shares on Facebook each day. I asked her permission to share the musical harvest, so you’ll links to the first 10 days of music to put you in the Halloween spirit, along with an explanation of the project in her own words. The remainder of the month’s music will be broken into two parts.

Do you have a name for this musical countdown project? How did you get the idea to do this?

There’s no particular official name for it, I’ve been calling it Hallowe’en Countdown most of all but describing it as a Hallowe’en “Advent Calendar.” The idea came from a couple of places. I did around 13 days up to Hallowe’en once, may have been fewer, and that was fun. Last year I had started to do a couple but not advertised it well, and not committed to it hard enough. My then-girlfriend criticized me out of continuing when I began to struggle, but I vowed to rectify my mistake. However, ultimately it’s all due to the combination of two important factors: one, my desire to share my severely-eclectic taste in music, and two, my need to add festivity to life so it doesn’t pass me by. As for the former, when you listen to more unusual and obscure things, but love them with so much of your heart, it’s really hard to try convincing other people that they may be missing out. You know you have something to offer that they’re unfamiliar with, and it’s like a gift—a broadening of horizons. For the latter, though, it’s really easy to become hyped for a season and feel like you get only a couple of evenings with it. As a choral singer I know the importance of practicing Christmas music for a month or so to keep oneself in the Christmas spirit—I am hoping do the same here for people with Hallowe’en, as they may be too busy to get to go to a lot of events. Why not just have a little Hallowe’en surprise every day?

Can you describe your history with music? How about your history with Halloween? Why are they meaningful to you?

Music is one of the most important things to me. It is a means of expression, of blowing off steam that life so likes to build up. I have spent so much time living in worlds of music, of allowing those worlds entry into the worlds of others. And here is yet another example of that. Rather than being me in a choir or on the ukulele, this is instead tapping into my deep love of playlist creation and playing around within thematic boundaries.

As for Hallowe’en, I adore the season. When I was younger I was so afraid of creepiness and jump scares, so sometimes Hallowe’en was a bit tough for me. But as I grew, I found solace and excitement in the bizarre, the twisted, the darkly humorous, and, particularly, the atmospheric. These are all things that the season has in spades. Hallowe’en solidified itself as part of my soul in, oh, what was it … 2009! That was when Disneyland decided to finally go all-out with the Hallowe’en celebration, in its decorations, and even by revamping one of my favorite rides, Space Mountain, to be attacked by nebulous ghosts … incidentally, during Hallowe’en, both of my favorite attractions, Space Mountain and Haunted Mansion, are revamped, and while I like neither overhaul even remotely as much as the normal versions, they each have their own important charms to me.

I was so excited at the time to see what was going on and I begged my mother to please let us go, and surely enough, we saved up the money to experience it, it was truly incredible. I kept myself on a Hallowe’en high that entire freaking month, and it led to the ramping up of one of my most favorite traditions, Jack-O-Lantern carving. Because I was so excited for Disneyland, and because I always dream so largely, I decided that I would attempt the seemingly-impossible—carving the exterior of Space Mountain, that white spiky dome, onto a pumpkin. And I’ll be damned if I didn’t do it.

Unfortunately, due to my camera breaking, I only have a day picture, so it is isn’t lit up, but I will share it. I had already been mostly making my own makeshift stencils rather than printing normal ones for awhile, but it just elevated at that point and after it. I went on to carve the famous silhouette from Fantasia of Mickey and the conductor shaking hands, and, my favorite of all, I carved the famous poster of Amadeus, with the costume that plays a role in the film. Unfortunately, my last two years have dreamed too big and resulted in carving projects that have failed rather miserably. My taking this musical project and deciding to do it for the entire month is apparently my new way, for this year at least, of ramping up the spirit of the season.

How do you approach this? Did you have every day planned out when you began the project or do you take it day by day?

Oh, I have the entire thing as a private playlist on YouTube already. I spent a couple of weeks, on and off, going in surges of deep thought about what I could tap into to really make the count. I had intended to go for just another 13 and then realized that, damn it, I wanted to share more than just that many! Plus, it allows both myself and others to get that spirit every single day.

Every evening, as it gets close to midnight, I go onto my wall and share the following day’s piece, this is where the only real bit of work still remains given the list is complete–I have an idea for what I want to write in my blurb for nearly all of these, but then there’s the process of actually writing it. Usually, by the time I’m done perfecting what I want to say, it’s just about midnight, or at least no further than a half an hour early. In addition to simply the stylistic appropriateness of posting something spooky at midnight, my hope is that this allows those interested in the countdown, who, for all I know, could have very different schedules, to have access to the song whenever they need.

There was a surprise to me that occurred a couple days ago that resulted in slight editing and more coherence to an idea that I had still been struggling with. Occasionally, for whatever reason, I may post what I refer to as a “Bonus Chocolate” in the comments below the song—as I look at each song as being a virtual treat from a Hallowe’en equivalent to an Advent calendar, this is as if you were to remove the chocolate and another were to appear (not that that happens in actual Advent calendars). This allows me to throw in a couple of extra surprises for whatever reasons I might want to do so–whether to give a sense of completeness to the first song, or as in the case of the first Bonus, that the song above was just too short.

Tell me about your choice to kick off with the Headless Horseman Song, and specifically this version?

Good question! I did a lot of planning about how I’d specifically want to arrange the days. I can tell you from my extensive work at my hobby of mix cd creation that too much of one sound or perhaps of a dismal feel can wear on the audience if it isn’t prepared for it. Some, not necessarily many, but some of my songs are damned creepy or at least weird and not up everyone’s alley. By beginning with a piece that was jazzy and fun, I felt I had more of a chance to draw people in so they wouldn’t get a bad impression from the get-go and maybe decide to stop listening.

As for that version, there are a couple of reasons. One is that when I did a much shorter Hallowe’en countdown once before, I began with another arrangement of the piece. There was a slight worry about being too repetitive with my previous song choices that I have worked hard to rectify. More importantly to me, however, I had been looking up the version I had used before and stumbled upon this other arrangement by accident. I hadn’t known it had even existed!

And much of what this countdown aims to do is share music that its audience either doesn’t know at all or hasn’t heard a particular version of—I know from a wonderful collection of Disney music that aims to do the latter how wonderful that feeling of discovery can be. Kay Starr’s voice is something I discovered last Christmas when I was at a store and her cover of “Everybody’s Waiting For the Man With the Bag” played, I was hooked immediately and needed to look the song up. There’s something both crisp and yet knowingly playful about her sound. Finally, I just freaking adore any version of the song. I grew a minor obsession with it, as I do with many songs that pop into my life, in high school, and last year finally worked out how to play it on the ukulele.

How did you decide to break it up into Fearful Friday, Storytelling Saturday? Are there any days that I forgot?

Ah! This was a combination of a few factors. One of them, frankly, is just my obsessive showmanship.

Making things harder on myself, giving more restrictions—like I do with my poetry. People think rhyme is outdated and restrictive, but I think it’s part of craftsmanship, and it’s an intellectually stimulating brain puzzle for me. So separating the music into categories that I could then flashily associate with a carnival barker announcement, that’s a lot of fun for me.

It also has to do with that hope of mine to try and separate the songs well enough to not flood an audience member with too much of a thing they may not like at once. This countdown features an incredibly diverse collection of music, which is already hard on some people’s ears, to make it worse, much of it is really bizarre and sometimes even gloomy as we’re diving into the world of Hallowe’en, the world of the weird, the hellish, and that’s not always fun—because it’s not always supposed to be.

I may love the experience of listening to something harsh or creepy as much as something silly (and this countdown does have plenty of silly) but that isn’t true of everyone. Finally, I had hoped to keep people hooked through the introduction of categories … they could say “oh, It’s time for another song from Disney … I love Disney, I wonder what it will be?” Hopefully increasing the sense of anticipation, you know?

Anyway, here are the categories … Disney Donnerstag (Donnerstag is Thursday in German, I wanted these all to be alliterative! This is the Disney Day), Fearful Friday (one of my weaker categories in terms of theme, honestly, each piece deals in some way with fear, not always on a very deep level). The category may be weak, but it produces a lot of music that just feels classic and right for a Hallowe’en countdown, so I’m not complaining. Good to have some sense of stability!

Storytelling Saturday (I knew from the get-go with this countdown that I wanted something like this, Hallowe’en is a great time for stories and I have some doozies … some of my favorites I have shared before generally, often several times, but maybe they haven’t really been given a look. Hopefully this encourages more people to give music they know less a chance! For example, today’s piece is truly one of my favorite discoveries of the last year … and it’s a RAP song. I can understand the hesitation with that genre, but I know from experience how fun the song is for people who don’t even like rap.).

Soundscape Sunday was another thing I had been hopeful for, as far mixing it all up–the opportunity to share really ambient music to get one into a spooky mood, without making the countdown be all that–not everyone likes flooding themselves with weirdness like I do! I had known from the beginning I wanted to share some things that just made someone FEEL something, you know? Cause that’s what makes horror so cool as a film genre, and one of the oldest, at that—its craftsmanship with atmosphere!

Mundane Monday is perhaps my favorite theme as a theme–because it’s entirely sarcastic. I use it to share things that are twisted in some fashion and yet I get to pretend that there’s nothing unusual about them at all and express confusion as to what I was thinking when I chose them for this Hallowe’en list. Plus, starting off the beginning of the workweek with a declaration that you can’t have fun forever, so here’s something mundane … that’s satisfying.

TV Tuesday, this is all just stuff from TV or inspired by it. Not much to say here other than the two middle entries are going to be really nostalgic for people of my age but may not have much meaning for someone who isn’t … we’ll see!

And finally, Who Knows? Wednesday (the grab bag category where I threw in what was left over, that I couldn’t fit in other places.). It was a lot of hard work to decide on the perfect categories for what I wanted to work with, then arrange them from one to another, but it was a big logic puzzle—lots of grueling fun.

Of the 10 days that you’ve posted so far, do you have any favorites?

Yes, for one reason or another. Today’s entry is just a song I adore so much, but beyond that … I’ve been listening to Mystery Skulls so much recently, it’s so catchy, and Van Canto’s cover of “Fear of the Dark” actually ranks very high on my list of personal favorite vocal recordings. However, my favorite day of the countdown as a countdown was Day 04, both because of just how incredibly mesmerizing the track is and because of my blurb for it—I channeled so much of how I feel about atmosphere into the intro and I think it reads beautifully.

Looking forward in your countdown, what can people expect? Do you already know how you’re going to end it?

Of course, I have it all planned out, after all! They may want to be aware that I think week three is the darkest week and I don’t know how well I got the balance of its mood worked out. I think you in particular are going to find something really amusing about this Monday’s entry, though. No spoiling what.

Is there anything you’d like to add?

Whether by listening to this countdown or not, if you don’t want to miss the precious moments of a season, you’ve gotta put that season into moments that you actually have time for. It’s like with writing.

Everyone is busy. You will always have excuses to not make time for something important to you, and many, even most of those excuses are truly valid. But you have to try anyway, because if you don’t, then you’ve missed out on what you really wanted. The best things in life require work, to make them happen and make them more valuable when they do happen. So if you want to make memories with people you care about that and don’t have time for it, you have to try anyway. Happy Hallowe’en!

October 1: Welcome, foolish mortals, to the 1st of October! I am your host, Mme. Lola! It just so happens to be Thursday, which means that we begin this month on a DISNEY DONNERSTAG! That’s right! Every Thursday of this month, I’ll be diving deep into the Disney Vault to find gems for you that fit the disembodied spirit of the season. Our tour begins here, in this wonderful cover. The Headless Horseman Song was originally performed by Bing Crosby in the Disney classic “The Adventures of Ichabod Crane.” Bing would go on to record a longer version that would be re-imagined yet again by Thurl Ravenscroft, and, as heard here, Kay Starr. Starr’s crisp, playful voice is beckoning you into the long, dark alley of our countdown. Do you follow?

October 2: The 2nd of October-Hey there, Boys and Ghouls! You’ve made it to the end of the work week, which means we’ve arrived at a Fearful Friday! Every Friday of our countdown, I’ll be sharing a piece of music related to the emotion most directly tied to Hallowe’en—Fear! Pretty straightforward, eh? Let’s begin with a personal favorite of mine. Iron Maiden’s classic metal opus Fear of the Dark would be perfect enough for our needs, but did you know that not-so-guilty-pleasure Van Canto released a nearly a capella cover of this track? Every guitar has been replaced with a voice, with only a drum standing out among the instrumentation. The first minute and 39 seconds perennially stands out for me as among my favorite in all of vocal music, and of course the rest of the track is pretty damn sweet too. Hope you’re enjoying these Hallowe’en treats! See you tomorrow with another!

October 3: October 3rd: Well, darlings, we’ve made it to the weekend…and thusly to our first STORYTELLING SATURDAY! As you may imagine, each Saturday of the month features a song that tells a story. Every other Saturday’s story will be told mainly through the lyrics (though with only one exception there will still certainly be quite a bit to look at to aid every story) but for today, how about a story told entirely within the music video? MysteryBen27 took the internet by storm last Hallowe’en when he posted this incredible animated sequence as an unofficial music video to a track by a favorite band of his, Mystery Skulls. The incredible quality of the fanmade video received such acclaim and popularity that it gained a fandom of its own, lurking (where else?) in the corners of Youtube and Tumblr. We’ve got so much more to discover on this journey to All Hallow’s Eve, but for now, enjoy this fantastic video and curse me for introducing you to a song that WILL HAUNT YOUR HEAD FOREVER! (with catchiness)

October 4: Horror is one of the oldest genres of film, not due to any need for fright, but instead for its potency in the art of escapism. Atmosphere is near-outright demanded of horror—it is the lifeblood Count Orlok craves so desperately to draw not from us, but into us. And so it is that, to truly give a sake of intellectual and spiritual completeness to our countdown, I introduce Soundscape Sunday. Each of these tracks is intended to ferry you deep into subterranean avenues of sound. For our opening trip, allow Tomas Dvorak, the creative genius who brought to life a world of living machinery and profound melancholy in the soundtrack for point and click adventure game Machinarium, to perform for you here “The Clockwise Operetta.” Thank you.

October 5: Festivity and weekends are fine and dandy, but eventually, the work week has to start again, returning us to our drudgery. We all have to grow up in the end. That’s why, and I can’t believe I’m saying this, I present our first MUNDANE MONDAY. Every Monday of the month I present something really ordinary and not scary at all…..Listen, I’ll level with you. I was really drunk by the end of the calendar planning session, and am now far too busy to change anything. So, I guess, uh, here’s a song about business meetings. In ASL!

October 6: Our first TV TUESDAY! As you can no doubt guess, every Tuesday I look to the small screen for inspiration. This week’s TV Tuesday was brought to you by: Ruby Gloom! I discovered this little gem of a show by taking a chance on Netflix one evening when I was home, alone, and depressed. The gorgeous animation drew me in right from the beginning with this wonderful intro and its stupidly catchy theme song. If you’re looking for a nice little something to watch with your kids that is definitely appropriate for them but also has some solid dark humor and great visual design for you, look no further. It’s a kid’s show, certainly, but we all need a little of that sometimes. Wh-what’s that? N-No…I didn’t decide on this entry just so we could have a Ruby Tuesday…how dare you accuse me of setting up an elaborate pun…..even though…you’re probably right…

October 7: And now for the final and most brilliant of all the weekly themes: Who Knows? Wednesday! This is the day where I threw stuff in that I couldn’t fit into other categories. Considering I worked out a whopping SIX others that I could keep consistent all month long, I feel no shame about this. What’ll it be this week? Who Knows? Actually, you do! Because you can see it below! Singer Meat Loaf is known for bringing an almost operatic approach to his rock music, written by the brilliant Jim Steinman. Meat Loaf isn’t about having a good voice, but instead entirely about how he throws his heart into every single note. There’s something beautiful about that. Like his lyrics, a simple look at the cover art will tell you this music is out of a biker gang fantasy, with terrifying demons and damsels in distress (not that any of the women in his songs could be said to fit that role–far from it, in fact, as a constant clash occurs from a man constantly living on the edge falling for a woman with way more sense than he could ever hope to have). With a name like Bat Out of Hell, not finding a place for this track seemed a crime for our countdown. So here’s a rare recording from his incredible concert with the Melborne Symphony Orchestra as the replacement for his usual instrumentation. Rock on—with orchestration! See you tomorrow!

October 8: Heute wir ein andere Disney Donnerstag haben! To a great many people of this earth, a Hallowe’en celebration–particularly a musical one–without the presence of Danny Elfman’s masterpiece “The Nightmare Before Christmas” is roughly equivalent to committing a hate crime towards Santa Claus. This puts hipster trash such as myself in an awkward position when we wish to try and present as much obscure material as possible. But never fear! Before I actually had the opportunity to really get into that wonderful film, its influence slowly seeped into me from my treasured copy of the soundtrack to Kingdom Hearts–a bizarre and wonderful video game series which allows characters from the universes of both Disney and Square-Enix to cross over in an epic action-RPG. Here is the arrangement of a classic NB4C tune, utilized as the normal world music for Hallowe’en town itself. But wait, there’s more….

October 09: Oh no! Another Fearful Friday! “Spooky Scary Skeletons” is a Hallowe’en song by Andrew Gold about, well, spooky, scary, skeletons. How that piece in particular sliced itself off its own cherished corner of the internet is difficult to say; as of this post’s writing, Know Your Meme is still researching the origin of its popularity. Nevertheless, among the many derivative works the song inspired, electronic music artist The Living Tombstone***’s rather dubstep-ified remix is a particular standout in quality. Give it a listen!

***who you may know as the artist who made such a popular remix of Eurobeat’s ‘Discord’ fan song that the original faded into relative obscurity and is now covered in nasty comments declaring that it’s just not as good as its remix despite the sheer originality of the original and its capturing the villain’s spirit waaay more…(*sigh*…I’m sorry. Had to get that out of my system.)

October 10: We enter our second Storytelling Saturday with probably my favorite musical discovery of the past year. I love this song so…deeply. I have every lyric memorized. Please don’t be turned off by its being a genre you may not yet appreciate–I’m still finding my footing with rap too. This is just, on the whole, an excellent freaking story both in its plot and its very telling. I have chosen to share this lyrics video of it rather than the music video, as the lyrics are really the focus–unfortunately, there are some errors. Actually, the only swear that shows up is an error, if you listen closely, you may realize this. Ordinarily I’d have already launched into its origin or popularity or suchlike…but I will do that below. Listen to the full song before watching either of the clips below, please!